Complaints, Tirades, and General Bitching

Has anyone actually had a complete breakfast before? Remember those commercials for cereal and it always said that cereal was "part of a complete breakfast?" This was accompanied by a picture of a bowl of cereal, a glass of milk (isn't that already in the cereal?), a glass of orange juice (i've never seen anyone simultaneously drink milk and orange juice, save for the winners of the indy 500), toast, and sometimes even fruit? There's just so many things wrong with this:
A. People who eat cereal are lazy or at least like the convenience of its two step preparation. are they really going to make toast too and pour a glass of milk and orange juice?
B. When I eat cereal, that's all I eat because it is enough to sustain me. Who has room in their stomach for 2 more glasses of liquid and 2 pieces of toast?
C. Half the time these advertisements were made for sugar packed cereals. Do you really think parents give a fuck about their child's nutrition if they're buying them cookies (for breakfast?!)

Paper should not have the ability to cut you. That's just bullshit.

I've become very critical of commercials over the years. Currently, I have issues with a GM commercial and a Bud Light commercial. The GM commercial discusses how we need to put on our "rally caps," buckle down, and push through these hard times to get the economy back on track.......um, excuse me? I wasn't aware that the economy went down the tank because of Americans being lazy. Hey everyone, let's get to work to fix this thing! Oh wait, there's no jobs for us. GM is the one who took the bailout, not us. We'll get back to work though since the economy is our fault and then we'll go buy one of your cars too! You guys should be president.
On to the Bud Light commercial. It's the one where Conan O'Brien's agent talks him into doing a commercial for some country overseas and he guarantees him that it won't air in the states but then it does. This commercial would have worked 5 years ago, but now they're just completely ignorant of the existence of youtube. If anything even remotely funny is on video, it ends up on youtube, especially if it deals with a celebrity. Completely unrealistic commercial.

I thought of an idea for a vegas hotel. The prices to rent the rooms would be ridiculously low (we're talking like maybe $20 a night) but there would be a catch--upon entering the hotel doors, you would waive all your rights and would have cameras in your room that would have live streams on the internet. Your picture and room number would be featured on the website so people could know who was staying in what rooms so they could watch them shower, use the bathroom, etc. Subscribers could watch the live streams 24/7 online. I think this could be a profitable venture. Would you really care if complete strangers may or may not be watching you while you take a shower? Just don't tell your friends you're staying at the hotel.

I also have an idea for a vegas buffet too. It would be slightly cheaper than other middle of th road buffets, but it would of course have a catch--you only have one hour to eat. Your table would have a giant timer on it and once time is up, you're out of there. Each table would also have a giant map of the buffet on it so you could strategize your next trip to the food. I think it would be fun except for the inevitable injuries that would result from people running into each other and all the broken plates and glases. It would be like Iron Chef, except eating instead of cooking.

98% of the time people say that something is ironic, it isn't.

I don't like it when at the school dining halls and cafes and stuff they thank you when you order and they swipe your ID. The workers there really have nothing to thank you for considering:
A. The swipe you just used was something you paid for in advance, so they can't really be thanking you for your patronage since they already got your money.
B. Since they already made the money your use of the swipes is irrelevant to them and is thus just giving them work they don't have/want to do.
Basically, they shouldn't be thanking you at all......but you should probably thank them.